Notes: Continuing onwards... Zork belongs to Activision and Infocom and if they really loved me, they’d make another game in the series.

PS: I’ll see what I can do about Redaboz, Kerewin. Somehow, though, I think his ego will survive relatively unscathed. (A tapestry in Megaboz’s hut in Zork Zero: “Forget the rest; Megaboz is the best.) If anyone else out there is reading this, review. Please? Lives are on the line here, peoples!

Traversing The Underground:

The Travel Diary Of Kie Dalvar, Adventuress

By Makou

Estuary 5, 700 GUE

Dear Kie, (At least, I think that’s your name.)

Where am I? Auntie Em? Wilbur? Chief? McCloud? I’m scared. It’s dark and it’s cold and strangely papery. Hello? Is anyone listening to me? Anyone? There’s no place like home! There’s no place like home!

Wait, where’s home? What’s my name, that’s an even bigger question. Wait… Jimbo. Yes, that’s right Jimbo. Silly name, but it’s the only one I have in this dark, unpleasant and above all, papery world.

I feel so very lonely. I need a hug.

- Jimbo

“SAINT YORUK ON A POGO STICK!” shouted Kie, waking Megaboz from a pleasant dream involving squirrels and flowers and empire destroying.

“What is it now, Miss Clerk?” grumbled Megaboz.

“You did something to it, didn’t you?” said Kie, waving her diary in Megaboz’s general direction. “Fess up!”

“About what, pray tell?”

“About this!” She shoved the open diary under Megaboz’s nose.

<“Oh boy, first few hours of bookish sentience and already people are yelling at me. I feel so unloved. - Jimbo>

“Oh, that,” said Megaboz dismissively. “I just did a little adjustment to your diary after your little fall. I thought it could stand an improvement.”

“Redaboz, you son of a…” began Kie.

“Uh uh uh!” Megaboz shook his index finger at Kie in a very aggravating way. “I told you, it’s ‘Megaboz’. And you’re hurting poor little Jimbo’s feelings.” He pointed the finger down at the still-open diary.

<I’m sorry, so sorry. Did I offend someone? Am I not wanted here? Is it because of my writing style? I can change it, if you really want. – Jimbo>

“See?” said Megaboz.

“No, no, you don’t have to change your writing style,” said Kie to her diary. “It’s a wonderful style, so please, don’t blubber.”

<Oh, thank you! I’m just very sensitive right now, being so very young and innocent right now… I also have a strange craving for carrot cake. Is that normal? - Jimbo>

Kie furrowed her brow. “Carrot cake?”

“Excuse me, Miss Clerk?” said Megaboz.

“Just what do you want now, Redaboz? Can’t you see that I’m in the middle of a conversation?”

“I see that, I see that…” said Megaboz. “I just wanted to point out that before I cast that little spell on your ever so precious diary, I had a chance to read a bit of it.”

Kie blanched and looked at Megaboz disbelievingly. He wouldn’t… No, wait, this was Redaboz they were talking about. Of course he would. In fact, he probably saw it as his Implementor-given right to do so. How silly of her to think otherwise.

“I just wanted to tell you that your little plan to strand me in Antharia won’t work. And yes, you really should learn how magic works before you even begin to think about taking me on.”

“Shit!”

“Indeed. Oh, and about that incident with your cousins…”

“What about it?” Kie glared at Megaboz.

“Just were you expecting to keep them in line once they actually began to learn about grues? I would have threatened to turn them all into bat guano.”

“Maybe,” said Kie through clenched teeth. “Because some of us can’t actually turn our little cousins into bat guano, much as we’d like to! You know, the whole ‘no magic’ thing?”

“Now whose fault is that?”

“Even if it were,” said Kie. “Just how many people in the world do you think have as much natural talent at it as you do? Hmmm?”

“Why, is this an inadvertent compliment?” asked Megaboz in mock amazement. “How incredible!”

“Whatever. I might as well compliment you for having black hair. It would mean as much.”

<Hello? I’m feeling a bit lonely. – Jimbo>

“But you see, Redaboz, some of us aren’t so damned gifted and have to actually, oh, I don’t know, work to get anywhere in life,” said Kie, not noticing Jimbo as she wasn’t looking at the diary.

“There’s a certain amount of studying and researching involved too, you know,” said Megaboz sulkily. “Do you honestly think I was born knowing how to turn purple things invisible?”

“So that’s what happened to my socks! I should’ve known you were behind it!” said Kie.

“Well? They were ugly socks!”

<I’d really like it if someone looked at me now. – Jimbo>

“They were not!”

“They were so!”

<Please? I’m having self esteem issues here. – Jimbo>

“They were not! Now apologize!”

“I will not! No jury in the land would convict me once they knew how ugly those socks were! Now shut-up so we have a chance of making it to Tiddani-by-the-Sea before the apocalypse!” He stood up and began walking. His pack followed in the air behind him.

“That asshole. It’s not as if that bloody town’s even very far,” muttered Kie. She slammed Jimbo shut, threw her pack over her shoulder and began following Megaboz. “I’ll get him back before this trip’s ended, I swear it…”